Blog Tour + Release Day Review & Excerpt: The Dark Ones by Rachel Van Dyken

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Welcome to today’s stop on the blog tour for The Dark Ones by Rachel Van Dyken!

The Dark Ones by Rachel Van Dyken

The Dark Ones by Rachel Van Dyken
Series: The Dark Ones Saga #1 (full reading order below)
Publication Date: September 20th 2015
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To touch a Dark One is death.
To talk to an immortal is suicide.
Yet, I’ve been marked by both.
A Vampire.
And the King of the immortals.
My life is no longer my own.
And now I know the truth, my life was never mine to begin with.
It was theirs.
It’s always been theirs.

Buy Links:
Amazon • Barnes & NobleiTunes • Kobo

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The Dark Ones is a paranormal read from Rachel Van Dyken, and I found myself enjoying it so much! I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect from this book after reading the blurb, but this ended up being a pretty great read. The Dark Ones is the first book in The Dark Ones Saga, but it can be read as a complete standalone, which I was super thankful for. RVD includes a ton of different paranormal elements, but not too many that it became overwhelming. So if you’re in the mood to read a PNR, you should definitely give this book a try!

Genesis is a human who’s just been chosen by a Dark One, the leader of immortals, half-human and half-angel. She’s called to serve the immortals, believing that her job will be to teach them about modern technology, but when she arrives, she finds out that what she’s been taught all her life about immortals has been wrong.

“To us, you’re not ugly. You are absolute perfection.”
“To a Dark One,” Mason continued, “you’re life itself.”

After being thrust into the paranormal world, and on the run from the Dark One, Cassius, Genesis befriends a group of immortals with whom she finally find a place to belong. There’s Alex, a male siren, his sister Stephanie, also a siren. There’s the werewolf Mason, who’s actually a vegetarian and loves to cook. And then there’s Ethan, the vampire, who bonds with her in order to save her from Cassius.

Ethan is very reluctant to mate with Genesis, after the tragedy that happened with his previous mate. But since this is the only way to save Genesis, and Genesis is the one human who has the potential to save their world, he begins the painful process of bonding with her. What he doesn’t expect is to actually fall for the human.

She gave me her body.
In return, I gave her my soul.

The romance between Ethan and Genesis had a bit of insta-lust, but not until they became mates, so I was actually okay with that. I liked how protective Ethan was over Genesis, even when he was protecting her from himself. The two of them are so sweet together, and I loved that we get both of their POVs. This book is definitely not a long triangle, so for those who are against them, this is the book for you!

Overall, The Dark Ones was a fun read with a lot of potential as a series-starter. I loved the supporting characters – they made this book a lot more light-hearted than I expected. I’m very much looking forward to the sequel, because of who the hero will be. If you’re looking for a fast-paced, sexy, refreshing PNR, I highly recommend The Dark Ones!

4 hearts
lacey

Quotes are taken from the arc and are subject to change in the final version.

Now here’s an excerpt from The Dark Ones! ❤

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I still tasted her blood on my lips, was embarrassed for the first time in a century when Alex glanced up from his spot at the kitchen table to see me licking my lips like I’d just devoured the poor girl.

He shook his head. “Been that long, huh?”

“Alex…” I closed my eyes and prayed for patience. “…remind me why I let you live here?”

“I’m good-looking,” he answered simply. “Besides, I’m a hell of a fighter — scrappy, I think is how you define my kind. You need me.”

“Stop.” I pressed my fingertips to my temples and rubbed. The ache to have her had consumed me so much that I’d run down the stairs moving so fast I’d nearly collided with a wall, and grabbed blood from the fridge.

I didn’t need it.

But I craved it.

And if I didn’t drink the donated blood, I sure as hell was going to drain her and enjoyed very last drop.

“I wonder” Alex’s voice pierced my thoughts. “What’s it like?” He leaned forward. “Having to learn self-control all over again… being as ancient as you are?”

I ignored him.

He kept talking.

“Blood-free for a century and now…” He grinned and licked his lips. “Kind of like falling off the wagon, yeah?”

“You’re giving me a headache.” I threw the empty bag of blood at his face. He moved to the side and snickered. “And I’m fine. Everything is just—”

Her smell was intoxicating. She was walking down the stairs, so her heart picked up speed, her body giving off a scent of burnt vanilla and oranges with a hint of sugar. My mouth literally watered.

“Fine?” Alex said in a mocking voice. “Was that what you were going to say? Damn, man show a little decorum, you look… starved.”

“I am,” I whispered and fought the urge to rock back and forth. That was the problem with mating — with bonding. Nothing tasted like her, nothing ever would, and typically, having her as my mate gave me full access.

But the more I took…

The stronger the bond.

And the more I wanted…

It was a vicious overwhelming cycle. It would lead me to become emotionally invested while she, as a human, could simply pretend.

It wasn’t fair.

Immortals, in essence, were cursed with a deep desire to be like a human — to possess them, to bond with them forever — while humans only felt the same draw to us if they actually loved us.

Ridiculous.

“Oh, there you are.” Stephanie pushed Genesis forward and pulled out a chair.

Slowly, Genesis took a seat and glared at each one of us. “Where’s Mason?”

It shouldn’t have pissed me off.

But it had.

“He’s none of your concern,” I spat.

“Easy!” Alex chuckled. “Rule number one, don’t ask your mate where the other dude is. Just… don’t.”

Genesis blinked at Alex then back at me. “Because you guys have the capacity for jealousy.”

Alex whistled while Stephanie laughed.

Immortals were the most jealous beings on the planet. Had her school taught her nothing?

Was I to be her tutor as well?

“So…” Alex trained his eyes on her, putting her at as much ease as he could without stopping her poor heart. “Now that the mating is complete, you get to learn all about us and service your man here.” He slapped my back.

Really. Really. Poor choice of words.

Genesis paled.

I rolled my eyes. “He’s kidding.”

Alex laughed. “I think it needs to be said that having a human at the house has already helped my mood immensely.”

“That makes one of you,” Genesis said under her breath.

Alex leaned forward and whispered, “Ethan, try not to be so grouchy. Keep the fangs in and all.”

I extended them just to prove a point.

Genesis recoiled.

I instantly felt guilty.

Damn it.

“You won’t…” I licked my lips. “You won’t have to service me, as Alex so delicately put it.”

“Is that what mates do?” Genesis asked, her eyes searching mine. “They…” She lifted her hands into the air and dropped them.

“If that’s what you think they do, we have a very big problem.” Alex mimicked her movements and winked.

She blushed.

I hissed at him and returned my attention to her. “It’s like a human relationship, only stronger. You’ll attend functions with me, be by my side, at my beck and call for as long as you live.”

I didn’t want to say until one day she just didn’t wake up. It sounded too cruel.

“And when I’m bored out of my mind… I do what?” She crossed her arms. “I mean, what could you possibly need from me?”

“Adorable.” Alex sighed happily. “I’m so glad we kept her.”

“Alex…” I was two seconds away from slamming him into the nearest wall. “Make yourself useful and find our human a snack.”

“I’m not a pet!” Genesis yelled. “And I’m not your human!”

“You are,” I yelled right back, “mine!”

“Kids.” Stephanie stepped between us.

I didn’t even realize I’d gotten out of the chair and was towering over her, fangs out, hands raised. She’d turned me into a monster. And still, my eyes found her erratic pulse. One more taste…

“Ethan—” Stephanie pushed against my chest. I didn’t move. “Ethan!”

“Friend…” Mason walked into the room. “Sit your ass down before she hands it to you.”

“Like she could!” I roared.

“Like I have!” Stephanie pushed me again. “Don’t tempt me… again.”

I sat, while Mason made his way over to Genesis and offered an easy smile. The man had nothing to smile about, yet he was smiling — at my mate.

I growled.

Mason gave me the finger and kept his attention trained on Genesis. “How do you feel?”

“Better.” She returned his smile and squeezed his outstretched hand. “Thanks for not… killing me when I asked.”

“Damn…” Alex said from the kitchen.

“You were in pain.” Mason shrugged. “And I’m glad you’re alright.”

“She’s fine. We’re fine. Everything’s fine,” I said through clenched teeth. “Now it’s probably time to give her answers before she thinks she can run off and actually survive in the real world without being hunted by a Dark One, or worse, found by Cassius.”

“He isn’t all bad,” Stephanie said defensively.

We all glared at her.

“What?” She lifted her hands into the air. “I’m just saying he’s been trying as hard as we have. So what if he’s gotten a bit possessive over the last few numbers that have been called.”

Alex slammed his fist onto the table. “He stole Ethan’s—”

“Enough.” I held up my hand. The pain in my chest grew until it was hard to breathe. I knew what would take that pain away.

Genesis.

But I was too angry to ask for it. Too ashamed to fall to my knees in front of a mere mortal and beg for her to end the pain by allowing me one solitary drop of her blood.

As if on cue, another bag of blood hit me in the head.

Alex must have sensed my mood.

I bit into it and looked away from Genesis’s horrified expression.

Reading Order: The Dark Ones Saga

The Dark Ones by Rachel Van Dyken Untouchable Darkness by Rachel Van Dyken

#1 ~ The Dark Ones: Ebook • Paperback • Goodreads
#2 ~ Untouchable Darkness: Ebook • Goodreads

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Rachel Van DykenRachel Van Dyken is the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and USA Today Bestselling author of regency and contemporary romances. When she’s not writing you can find her drinking coffee at Starbucks and plotting her next book while watching The Bachelor.

She keeps her home in Idaho with her Husband, adorable son, and two snoring boxers! She loves to hear from readers!

Want to be kept up to date on new releases? Text MAFIA to 66866!

You can connect with her on Facebook or join her fan group Rachel’s New Rockin Readers.

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Blog Tour + Excerpt & Giveaway: The Affiliate by K.A. Linde

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Welcome to today’s stop on the blog tour for The Affiliate!

The Affiliate by K.A. Linde

The Affiliate by K.A. Linde
Series: Ascension #1
Publication Date: September 15th 2015
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On the day of her Presenting, in front of the entire Byern Court, seventeen-year-old Cyrene Strohm’s lifelong plans come to fruition when she’s chosen as an Affiliate to the Queen.

Or so she thinks.

When Cyrene receives a mysterious letter and an unreadable book, she finds nothing is as it seems. Thrust into a world of dangerous political intrigue and deadly magic, Cyrene’s position only grows more treacherous when she finds herself drawn to the one man she can never have…

King Edric himself.

Cyrene must decide if love is truly worth the price of freedom. Find out in this first book in USA Today bestselling author K.A. Linde’s new Ascension series.

Buy Links:
Amazon Ebook • Amazon Paperback • B&NKobo • iTunes

Now here’s an excerpt from The Affiliate! ❤

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“Cyrene,” he whispered.

Their breaths mingled in the space between them. They were so close that their noses almost brushed. His hands came around her waist, and then his lips fell lightly, ever so lightly, on her own.

Time froze.

Her eyes fluttered closed, and the taste of him consumed her. His lips were tender and appreciative, covering her mouth and perfectly fitting against her. He drew her against his broad chest, and she circled her arms around his neck.

The kiss intensified. Their mouths moved in time together, leaving her head dizzy. She wobbled on the tips of her toes as he held her in place. He started walking her backward into the bedroom. His hands dug into her dress, bunching the material around her waist. Her knees hit the footboard of the massive bed, and she could barely breathe as she realized where this was all going.

And still, she didn’t stop. The spark had turned into an inferno, flames engulfing them, and they were trapped in the blaze that was their passion.

His hands slid up to cup her face before easing into her hair. “Cyrene,” he murmured between kisses, “stay with me.”

about the author button

K.A. LindeUSA Today bestselling author K.A. Linde is the author of The Affiliate, the first book in the Ascension Series.  As a military brat, she traveled the world with her family, imaginary friends, and ever-increasing supply of books.  She has spent much of her life dreaming up new worlds and characters and forcing them into uncomfortable, usually life-threatening scenarios.  After graduating from the University of Georgia with a masters degree in political science, she began spending every waking hour putting those characters onto paper.

When not writing, she spends her time dancing, collecting paperbacks in the hopes of filling a Beauty and the Beast style library one day, traveling to visit her friends who live all over the country, and still reading anything she can get her hands on.  She currently resides in North Carolina with her husband and two puppies, Lucy and Riker, where she is hard at work on her next novel.

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Blog Tour + Excerpt: Dirty Promises by Karina Halle

Dirty Promises release

Dirty Promises by Karina Halle is live!

Dirty Promises by Karina Halle

Dirty Promises by Karina Halle
Series: Dirty Angels #3 (full reading order below)
Publication Date: September 15th 2015
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Blood. Sex. Revenge.
Being king comes at a brutal price.

Drug lord Javier Bernal has sliced and diced his way to the top of the Mexican drug trade, presiding over the country’s largest cartel. But his rise to power comes at a brutal price: the death of his sister, Alana. Devastated and wracked with guilt, he turns away from his new wife, Luisa, forcing their marriage into a steady decline. But it isn’t until she’s pushed into the waiting arms of Esteban Mendoza, his right-hand man, that Javier realizes everything he’s lost.

And it isn’t until he learns the truth about Alana, that he realizes everything there is to gain.

Blood will spill.
Cities will burn.
Heads will roll.
Because Javier will stop at nothing until he gets what he wants.
And what he wants is raw, ruthless revenge.

Dirty Promises is the third and final book in the Dirty Angels Trilogy. While the other two books – Dirty Angels and Dirty Deeds – can be read as standalones, it is recommended you read at least Dirty Angels before reading Dirty Promises.

Buy Links:
Amazon • Barnes & Noble • iTunes

Now here’s an excerpt from Dirty Promises! ❤

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My gun began to feel heavy in my hands. I needed to use it, and soon.

Light was seeping in underneath the door, so I pushed my goggles up on my head and slowly pushed it open.

The kitchen was empty, and the only light came from above the stove. The fridge hummed and the house was silent except for muffled laughter coming from down the hall.

A terrible scream splintered the room.

A man’s scream.

Had the ambush already begun?

I exchanged a worried glance with Diego as we heard doors further down the hall being flung open. Footsteps.

People ran past the kitchen, heading up the stairs toward the scream, not bothering to look our way.

All of them except for Juanito, that was.

He stopped dead in his tracks at the archway, staring at us like we were ghosts. I couldn’t help but grin.

He snapped out of it, reaching for his gun, but mine was already aimed at him. I shot him in the kneecaps, both of them, just as his gun fired, bullets cracking the ceiling.

Then, as if on cue, all of the outside erupted in gunfire. The sound shook the walls, and through the rattling windows bursts of light filled the sky. My army was here.

I ran over to Juanito who was screaming in pain, and picked him up by the collar, shaking him.

“All right you little fuckface,” I sneered at him, trying to fight the urge to strangle the fucking life out of him. “Tell me where Esteban is and I’ll make your death painless. Don’t tell me and I’ll break your bones with a hammer. Which one is it?”

His screaming wouldn’t stop. I shook him again. “You can’t protect him now. You’ll never fucking walk again and he sure as hell won’t give two fucks about a pathetic piece of garbage like you. So talk.”

But before he could, Diego was calling out my name. I let go of Juanito, rolling over him just in time as the air above me burned with bullets. Diego fired back at the assailants, and I kept rolling until I was behind the kitchen island. I quickly reached for the grenade which I knew could take out enough of them without damaging the structural integrity of the house, and tossed it out of the kitchen. It rolled down the hallway.

They yelled at each other to move but it was too late. I pressed my hands over my ears as the blast went off.

“Jesus, Javi,” Diego swore as pieces of plaster rained down on him. “You haven’t even moved back in yet.”

I didn’t care if it was sloppier than my usual methods — it was efficient. I scrambled to my feet and stared at the wreckage. There was a ragged hole in the wall, smoke and flames licking the edge.

I shrugged. “I wanted to open up that room anyway.”

Miraculously, or something of that nature, Juanito was still alive, holding on to his bleeding and blasted knees as he writhed on the floor.

He was missing half his face though, so it wasn’t like he escaped the explosion unscathed. He was very scathed and crawling for freedom.

I covered my nose and mouth with the crook of my elbow and walked into the smoke, letting it wash over me. Juanito looked up at me with what was left of him, begging for mercy with an outstretched hand.

I stepped on his hand instead, crunching the bones beneath my boot.

“That was for my sister,” I seethed. “I know you intercepted her call when she was calling me for help.”

“Javier, we have to go,” Diego said, coughing and coming over to stop me. A war was raging around me, but none of it mattered. All that mattered was an eye for an eye.

This time I stomped on Juanito’s arm, driving it in with all my might, like I was squashing a cockroach, until I felt it break beneath me.

He screamed.

I smiled.

But I was the furthest thing from happy.

And Juanito couldn’t even speak at this point. His mouth was a flap of burning skin, covering a gaping hole. He was useless.

I slid the hunter’s knife out of its sheath, and with one swift motion, stabbed it downward into the top of his skull.

The screaming stopped.​

Reading Order: Dirty Angels series

Dirty Angels by Karina Halle Dirty Deeds by Karina Halle Dirty Promises by Karina Halle

#1 ~ Dirty Angels: EbookPaperbackGoodreads
#2 ~ Dirty Deeds: EbookPaperbackGoodreads
#3 ~ Dirty Promises: Goodreads

about the author button

Karina HalleKarina Halle is a former travel writer and music journalist and The New York Times, Wall Street Journal and USA Today Bestselling author of Where Sea Meets Sky, Racing the Sun, The Pact, Love, in English, The Artists Trilogy, Dirty Angels and over 20 other wild and romantic reads. She lives on an island off the coast of British Columbia with her husband and her rescue pup, where she drinks a lot of wine, hikes a lot of trails and devours a lot of books.

Halle is represented by the Waxman Leavell Agency and is both self-published and published by Atria Books/Simon & Schuster and Hachette in North America and in the UK.

Hit her up on Instagram at @authorHalle , on Twitter at @MetalBlonde and on Facebook. You can also visit www.authorkarinahalle.com  and sign up for the newsletter for news, excerpts, previews, private book signing sales and more.

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Blog Tour + Release Day Review, Excerpt & Giveaway: Dirty Talk by Megan Erickson

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I’m so excited to be a part of the blog tour for Dirty Talk by Megan Erickson! Check out my review for the book below, as well as the first chapter and a giveaway!

Dirty Talk by Megan Erickson

Dirty Talk by Megan Erickson
Series: Mechanics of Love #2 (full reading order below)
Publication Date: September 15th 2015
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When the one you shouldn’t want is the one you can’t resist…

Brent Payton works hard, plays hard, and has earned his ladies’ man reputation. But he’s more than just a good time, even though no one seems to see it. Until a gorgeous brunette with knockout curves and big, thoughtful eyes walks into his family’s garage and makes Brent want more.

Ivy Dawn and her sister are done with men, all of them. They’ve uprooted their lives too many times on account of the opposite sex, but that’s over now. The plan seems easy until a sexy, dirty-talking mechanic bursts in Ivy’s life and shakes everything up.

Brent can’t resist the one person who sees past his devil-may-care façade, and Ivy finds it harder and harder to deny how happy he makes her. But she has secrets of her own and when the truth comes out, she must decide if she’ll run again or if she’ll take a chance on forever.

Buy Links:
Amazon • HarperCollins • B&N • iTunes • Google Play

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Megan Erickson’s Dirty Talk is perfect. Absolutely perfect. I loved everything about this book, and have no complaints, honestly. It’s a wonderful romance between a single mother and one sexy, endearing mechanic. I had high hopes for Dirty Talk after highly enjoying Dirty Thoughts, and Megan Erickson went above and beyond what I expected for Brent’s book. If you love contemporary romances, then you absolutely MUST read this book!

Brent Payton is the middle brother, the easy-going, funny one, the one no one takes seriously. He’s a playboy who has always had no trouble with the ladies… until Ivy Dawn enters his garage and his life. Brent is stunned by this incredible, headstrong single mother, and the more he sees her, the more he can’t get her out of his mind or his heart.

He would have been perfectly happy if women in the past had said he wasn’t a guy to take seriously. Because sometimes, he liked being the joke. He liked no strings and complications.
But with Ivy, he wanted the strings and the complications, and he didn’t know why. He just fucking did.

Ivy made a pact with her sister to swear off all men, after the rough life their little family had been through thanks to the opposite sex. They’re making a fresh start in Tory, and Ivy is determined to finally make a home and a life for her family. But Ivy’s vow isn’t quite holding up after meeting Brent. She sees right through his light-hearted exterior to the vulnerable, kind-hearted, dependable man no one ever notices, so how can help but fall for this wonderful man?

I loved how perfect Ivy and Brent are for each other – they see right into each other’s hearts, and they respect and appreciate the other so much. Ivy is at first wary of Brent’s intentions, but when Brent is determined to win the heart of the woman who’s stolen his own? I. Died. Protective, funny, charming, and with a wicked dirty mouth, Brent seriously became my new favorite hero. I fell so freaking hard for this man when he sets out to prove just how serious he is about Ivy and her daughter!

He wanted . . . Fuck, he wanted everything. To be inside of her, to be against her, to consume her.

And did I mention how HOT this book is!? As sweet as Brent is, he can also be dirty when he wants to, and holy hell, he was burning up the pages with his wicked mouth! *Grins* I loved it!

Dirty Talk is the perfect combination of sweet, sexy, and funny. I couldn’t help but be charmed by the romance and the characters, including all the supporting ones. This was such an endearing read, with wonderful characters I fell madly in love with. This is Megan Erickson’s best book yet, and I highly recommend it for fans of sweet, light-hearted romances!

5 hearts
lacey

Quotes are taken from the arc and are subject to change in the final version.

Now here’s chapter one from Dirty Talk! ❤

excerpt button

Brent Payton wanted some decent music while he was working.

Not this pop-rock crap the radio had been playing but real rock ’n’ roll. Hell, he’d take George Thurgood right about now. Some “Bad to the Bone”? Hells to the yeah. That was better than a cup of coffee, which he could really use this Monday morning.

He’d volunteered to spring for an iPod and a docking station so he could play his own music, but his technology-inept father had acted like Brent wanted to buy a spaceship.

So that was out.

“Brent,” Cal’s voice called from the other bay of their garage at Payton Automotive.

“Yeah?”

“What’s this shit on the radio?” his older brother asked. “Turn it down before my ears bleed.”

Brent snorted. Cal was grumpy on a normal basis. But now that he’d quit smoking and wore a nicotine patch, he was even more insufferable. So Brent didn’t argue and turned down the music.

A truck rumbled into the parking lot, and Brent turned around, squinting to see who it was.

Alex Dawn, the new employee they’d hired a week ago, strolled into the garage, a bandana wrapped around her head, wearing baggy jeans and a tight T-shirt. She held a banana in one hand.

Brent grinned and walked over to where she stood outside the door to the office, looking over the schedule for the day. She peeled her banana and took a bite. He leaned in and inhaled deeply. “I love the smell of estrogen in the morning.”

Her lips twitched only slightly before she turned around and socked him in the bicep, hard. The woman could hit.

He howled dramatically and clutched his arm, swinging it limply from the elbow. “I’m injured! I can’t work!”

While Alex gazed at him, one eyebrow raised in amusement, he forgot about his injury, grabbed her banana, and bit off half of it.

“You asshole! That’s my breakfast!” Alex smacked him in the stomach, and he started laughing, nearly choking on the banana. “I’m so stealing the Snickers you keep hidden in the office.”

He straightened in shock. “You wouldn’t.”

She was smug, the witch. “I would.”

“That’s war, woman.”

She took the rest of the banana out of the peel and then tossed it so it landed on his shoulder. “Then don’t mess with my banana.”

“That’s some grade-D dirty talk,” he said, picking the peel off of his shoulder and throwing it in the trash can.

“Will you two quit it and get to work?” his dad, Jack, hollered, sticking his head out of the office door. “It’s like you’re related.”

Brent shrugged and walked over to the minivan to continue rotating its tires. Alex smirked at him from her bay. Brent winked back.

Working with Alex had been rocky at first. She had a chip on her shoulder—which she refused talk about—and Brent really enjoyed trying to knock it off, which only led to their sniping at each other. But when some asshole customer gave her a hard time because she was a woman, and she told him to shove it—Payton and Sons Automotive didn’t really have that customer-is-always-right policy—Brent developed a newfound respect for her. When Brent backed her up in front of said asshole, she began giving him some respect in return. And so they’d fallen into this brother-sister type relationship that was actually kinda fun. Brent didn’t really have friendships with women and especially not women he’d never fucked.

And the thing about Alex was . . . he didn’t want to fuck her. It wasn’t because she wasn’t hot, because she was. But the chemistry between them was . . . lacking. Which surprised Brent. Because he was like hydrogen; he reacted with everyone.

Brent worked quietly for the rest of the morning, singing to himself when decent music came on, taking care of the minivan before moving on to the next job.

He was draining oil from an old Toyota when he heard voices from the front of the garage. He spotted Dick Carmichael talking to Alex. She pointed toward the back room, where Cal had disappeared. The Carmichaels had been coming to the shop since before Brent had started working there. Dick was a retired accountant, and his wife still cut hair in an add-on at their house.

“Can I help you, Dick?” Brent asked as he walked closer.

The man turned to him. “Hey, Brent. Uh, no, that’s fine. I’ll just wait for Cal.”

“Oh, well if you need—”

Dick waved him on. “It’s fine. You can get back to work. I’m sure you want to break for lunch soon.” He patted him on the shoulder, like he was a kid, and chuckled. “Your dad always says that’s your favorite part of the day.”

Brent tamped down the irritation. First, whatever Cal could help him with, Brent could too. Second, yeah, Brent liked eating a hell of a lot, but that didn’t mean he didn’t do his job.

So he nodded and walked back to the Toyota. He didn’t look up when he heard Cal return, when Dick spoke with Cal about some work he wanted to do to his car—work that Brent would probably be assigned to, but he wasn’t Cal, the responsible one.

Nor was he Max, their younger brother, the first of them all to become a college graduate.

Brent was the middle brother, the joker, the comic relief. The irresponsible one.

Never mind that he’d been working at this shop since he was sixteen. Never mind that he could do every job, inside and out, and fast as fuck.

Never mind that he could be counted on, even though no one treated him like that.

A pain registered in his wrist, and he glanced down at the veins and tendons straining against the skin in his arm, where he had a death grip on a wrench.

He loosened his fist and dropped the tool on the bench.

This wallowing shit had to stop.

This was his life. He was happy (mostly) and free (no ball and chain, no way), and so what if everyone thought he was a joke? He was good at that role, so the typecasting fit.

“Why so glum, sugar plum?” Alex said from beside him as she peered up into his face.

He twisted his lips into a smirk and propped a hip on the counter, crossing his arms over his chest. “I knew you had a crush on me, sweet cheeks.”

She narrowed her eyes, lips pursed to hide a smile. “Not even in your dreams.”

He sighed dramatically. “You’re just like all the ladies. Wanna piece of Brent. There’s enough to go around, Alex; no need to butter me up with sweet nicknames—”

A throat cleared. And Brent looked over to see a woman standing beside them, one hand on her hip, the other dangling at her side, holding a paper bag. Her dark eyebrows were raised, full red lips pursed.

And Brent blinked, hoping this wasn’t a mirage.

Tory, Maryland, wasn’t big, and he’d made it his mission to know every available female in the town limits and about a ten-mile radius outside of that.

This woman? He’d never seen her. He’d surely remember if he had.

Gorgeous. Long hair so dark brown it was almost black. Perfect face. It was September and still warm, so she wore a tight striped sundress that ended mid-thigh. She was tiny, probably over a foot smaller than he was. Fuck, the things that little body made him dream about. He wondered if she did yoga. Tiny and limber was his kryptonite.

Narrow waist, round hips, big tits.

No ring.

Bingo.

He smiled. Sure, she was probably a customer, but this wouldn’t be the first time he’d managed to use the garage to his advantage. Usually, he just had to toss around a tire or two, rev an engine, whatever, and they were more than eager to hand over a phone number and address. No one thought he was a consummate professional anyway, so why bother trying to be one?

He leaned his ass against the counter, crossing his arms over his chest. “Can I help you?”

She blinked, long lashes fluttering over her big blue eyes. “Can you help me?”

“Yeah, we’re full service here.” He resisted winking. That was kinda sleazy.

Her eyes widened for a fraction of a second before they shifted to Alex at his side and then back to him. Her eyes darkened for a minute, her tongue peeked out between those red lips, and then she straightened. “No, you can’t help me.”

He leaned forward. “Really? You sure?”

“Positive.”

“Like, how positive?

“I’m one hundred percent positive that I do not need help from you, Brent Payton.”

That made him pause. She knew his name. He knew he’d never met her, so that could only mean she’d heard about him somehow, and by the look on her face, it was nothing good.

Well, shit.

He opened his mouth, not sure what to say but hoping it would come to him, when Alex began cracking up next to him, slapping her thighs and snorting.

Brent glared at her. “And what’s your problem?”

Alex stepped forward, threw her arm around the shoulder of the woman in front of them, and smiled ear to ear. “Brent, meet my sister, Ivy. Ivy, thanks for making me proud.”

They were both smiling now, that same full-lipped, white-teethed smile. He surveyed Alex’s face and then Ivy’s, and holy fuck—how did he not notice this right away? They almost looked like twins.

And the sisters were looking at him now, wearing matching smug grins—and wasn’t that a total cock-block? He pointed at Alex. “What did you tell her about me?”

“That the day I interviewed, you asked me to re-create a Whitesnake music video on the hood of a car.”

He threw up his hands. “Can you let that go? You weren’t even my first choice. I wanted Cal’s girlfriend to do it.”

“Because that’s more appropriate,” Alex said drily.

“Excuse me for trying to liven it up around here.”

Ivy turned to her sister, so he got a better glimpse of those thighs he might sell his soul to touch. She held up the paper bag. “I brought lunch; hope that’s okay.”

“Of course it is,” Alex said. “Thanks a lot, since someone stole my breakfast.” She narrowed her eyes at Brent. Ivy turned to him slowly in disbelief, like she couldn’t believe he was that evil.

Brent had made a lot of bad first impressions in his life. A dad of one of his high school girlfriend’s had seen Brent’s bare ass, while Brent was lying on top of his daughter, before the dad ever saw Brent’s face. That had not gone over well. And yet this impression might be even worse.

Because he didn’t care about what that girl’s dad thought of him. Not really.

And he didn’t want to care about what Ivy thought of him, but, dammit, he did. It bothered the hell out of him that she’d written him off before even meeting him. Did Alex tell her any of his good qualities? Like . . . Brent wracked his brain for good qualities.

By the time he thought of one, the girls had already disappeared to the back room for lunch.

***

“Do you think we hurt his feelings?” Ivy picked at a stray piece of lettuce hanging out of her sandwich.

She didn’t meet her sister’s eyes, not even when Alex started making choking sounds across from her at the small table in the back of Payton and Sons Automotive.

“E-excuse me?” Alex stuttered.

Ivy bit her lip and lifted her gaze to her sister’s. Alex had talked a lot about Brent, and while there was an underlying platonic affection to her words, most of her talk was complaining about how much of a pain in her ass he was. Maybe Alex hadn’t been looking at Brent close enough during their conversation out in the garage, but Ivy had been. She’d noticed the flash of frustration over his face when they’d shut him down.

What made her pause was that it seemed like frustration directed at himself, not at her.

Crap. Ivy dipped her gaze back to her sandwich. This would not do. She and Alex had basically stamped a big red X over all dicks—literal and figurative—for a good long time. They’d already moved twice to get away from men who had ruined their lives. Tory was supposed to be where they settled in, got their lives straight, and raised Violet.

Ivy’s defense mechanism was to immediately be cold to Brent. She could have gotten bees with honey, but she didn’t want bees. Or honey. Or whatever. So she was all stinger.

She and Alex didn’t need men. The two of them and Violet would be just fine.

And yet at this moment, Ivy couldn’t stop thinking about Brent. Alex hadn’t warned her that he looked . . . like that. Like six-feet, two-inches of hotness straight out of a Mechanics of Your Dreams calendar. Jesus. That dark hair, those full lips that smirked, those slate eyes that did nothing to hide the fact that this man was trouble with a capital T.

“Iv-eeeeee.” Alex drew out her name in that way only big sisters could do when they planned to interrogate.

Ivy poked the wheat bread of her sandwich. “What?”

“Why are you concerned about Brent’s feelings?”

She didn’t know. Honestly and truly, she didn’t know, but she couldn’t forget that momentary flash of emotion that passed over his face before he covered it with a smirk. “I don’t know; he’s your coworker and—”

“I know he’s basically sex on legs, Ivy, but he knows it. And I’d be hard-pressed to find a woman who hasn’t taken a ride in this town.”

Ivy pressed her lips together, chastising herself for letting her soft heart show. She needed to focus on finding a job and raising her daughter. Those were her priorities. Not going toe-to-toe with some cocky hot guy. “You’re right; forget I said anything.” Ivy held up her index fingers and crossed them in an X. “No men.”

“Ick,” Alex spat.

“Gross,” Ivy said.

Alex grinned at her, and Ivy returned it, sipping from her iced tea. “So, work going okay?”

“Yeah, I like it here. Cal’s fair. Brent’s fun to work with. Jack’s still a hard-ass but I think he’s warming to me.”

Alex had told Ivy that Brent and Cal’s dad was a brick wall of gruff and stubborn. “Good.”

“Violet off to school okay?” Alex asked.

Ivy’s daughter was in first grade at White Pine Elementary School in the Tory school district. They’d moved in time for her start at the beginning of the school year. “Her teacher called me again, saying Vi cried on and off this morning.” Ivy knew moving was hard on her, but they hadn’t had much of a choice. “I hate this.”

Alex squeezed Ivy’s hand where it rested on the table. “It’s school. You’re not torturing her. She’ll get used to it.”

Ivy’s stomach rolled, thinking about it. “I hope.”

“She’s a good kid. She just needs time.”

Ivy sighed. “I guess.”

“Alex,” a deep voice said from the doorway. Ivy craned her head to see a man who looked a lot like Brent but . . . wasn’t Brent.

“Yeah?” Alex answered.

The man nodded at Ivy. “I’m Cal.” He turned to Alex. “Sorry. I know you’re eating lunch, but got that customer of yours out front from last week. I tried talking to her, but she likes you better.”

Alex laughed. “Greta Sherman?”

“That’s the one.”

She balled up her empty sandwich wrapper. “I’ll be back in a couple of minutes,” she said to Ivy.

Ivy looked down at her half-eaten lunch. “I can leave—”

“Nah, I’ll be right back. You finish eating.”

Alex tossed her trash into the can on the way out.

Ivy took a sip of her tea and picked at her sandwich. She’d spent all morning on the computer, applying for jobs in and around Tory. It wasn’t necessarily a mecca of job opportunities, but Alex had found a place she fit in, and the pay wasn’t bad. Ivy had some savings, but it wasn’t going to last forever, and she wanted to pull her weight in the little family they’d created.

Her résumé was a bit slim. She had a high school diploma but no college degree, having spent her early twenties raising Violet. Her job options in Tory were working as a secretary for a lawyer, selling furniture at a department store, or being a nanny.

None was appealing.

But at least they all paid.

The chair across from her squeaked, and she lifted her gaze, opening her mouth to tell Alex about her job options.

Except Alex wasn’t sitting across from her.

Brent was.

He leaned back in his chair, feet up on the table and crossed at the ankle. He held a packet of peanuts and tipped it so a couple fell into his mouth. He chewed, steel eyes on her.

She clenched her jaw shut.

He swallowed. “You looked like you were going to say something.”

“Sure I was. To Alex. But you’re not Alex.”

“No, I’m not. But I’m a great listener.”

“I’m sure,” she said drily.

His lips quirked. “Want to hear about what other things I’m good at?”

“Not particularly.”

“Because I can do this thing with my tongue—”

Good God. “I don’t do this.”

“Don’t do what?”

She waved a hand between them. “This. Flirting.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Babe, I haven’t even begun to flirt.”

She took a deep breath to calm her rising blood pressure. “Don’t do that either.”

“Jesus! Now what?” His exasperation might have been cute if she still had a heart.

“Nicknames.”

“Babe?”

“My name is Ivy. I-V-Y. Three letters. Two syllables.” Even she wanted to cringe at how much of a bitch she was being.

He was studying her now, his face a little less amused and more . . . thoughtful. She didn’t like thoughtful Brent. Amused, flirting Brent? Harmless. Thoughtful Brent, who tried to look deeper? Dangerous as hell.

He ran two fingers over his lips and then dropped his hand to the table, cocking his head. “You’re just thorns everywhere I touch, aren’t you?”

She froze at his words, like a deer in headlights because yes—yes, she was a whole lot of thorns because she’d learned long ago they were necessary to protect all her soft parts.

Brent wasn’t done, though; his voice was softer when he spoke again. “You born that way, or something make you that way, Ivy?”

She swallowed. Yep, Brent Payton was dangerous in a sexy-as-hell package. His words were seeping past those thorns, hitting all the spots where she was weak. So she gathered herself and clenched her fists at her sides. “You’re just acting like this because I’m the first woman who hasn’t fallen at your feet.”

He laughed at that. “Fallen at my feet? Nah, there are plenty of women who’ve told me to go to hell. My percentage is good, though. Maybe eighty-twenty.” He grinned that shit-eating grin. “But you got me curious now. I wanna keeping prodding until I find a place that isn’t a thorn. How long do you think that’ll take me?”

Shit, no; that’s exactly what she didn’t want. With those eyes that were smart and trouble at the same time.

She swallowed and straightened her spine. “You’ll never get close enough.”

He cocked his head. “No?”

“No.”

He hummed a little and leaned back in his chair again. He threw a peanut in the air and caught it in his mouth. Then he chewed, with those steel eyes daring her to look away. “Guess I gotta plan my attack better next time, huh? You better work on those defenses.”

She heard Alex’s voice as her sister made her way back to the lunchroom. Ivy smiled and lifted her chin. “Who says I’ll be the one who needs defense?”

He laughed sharply, like he was surprised. “Oh, babe, bring it.”

She gritted her teeth. “Ivy.”

“Babe. I call it as I see it, and you’re definitely babe.”

Ivy growled.

He smiled, and then he was up out of his chair and walking out the door as Alex made her way in. Her eyes trailed Brent as he retreated to the garage.

Alex turned to Ivy, eyes concerned. “Was he bothering you?”

Bothering didn’t even touch it. “No, he’s fine. Nothing I can’t handle.”

Alex shrugged. “I can talk to him—”

“Alex, I swear, it was nothing, and even if it was, I could handle it.”

Her sister eyed her and then stole a bite of her sandwich. “Fine; now eat. You’re getting skinny.”

“Quit mothering me.”

Alex pointed to the sandwich with raised eyebrows, and Ivy glared at her as she took a bite.

Reading Order: Mechanics of Love series

Dirty Thoughts by Megan Erickson Dirty Talk by Megan Erickson Dirty Deeds by Megan Erickson

#1 ~ Dirty Thoughts: My Review • EbookPaperback • Goodreads
#2 ~ Dirty Talk: Ebook • PaperbackGoodreads
#3 ~ Dirty Deeds: My Review • Ebook • Paperback • Goodreads

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Megan EricksonMegan Erickson grew up in a family that averages 5’5” on a good day and started writing to create characters who could reach the top kitchen shelf.

She’s got a couple of tattoos, has a thing for gladiators and has been called a crazy cat lady. After working as a journalist for years, she decided she liked creating her own endings better and switched back to fiction.

She lives in Pennsylvania with her husband, two kids and two cats. And no, she still can’t reach the stupid top shelf.

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Blog Tour + Review, Excerpt & Giveaway: When a Scot Ties the Knot by Tessa Dare

I’m so happy to be a part of the blog tour for When a Scot Ties the Knot by Tessa Dare! My review for the book is below, as well as an excerpt and giveaway!

When a Scot Ties the Knot by Tessa Dare

When a Scot Ties the Knot by Tessa Dare
Series: Castles Ever After #3 (full reading order below)
Publication Date: August 25th 2015
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On the cusp of her first London season, Miss Madeline Gracechurch was shy, pretty and talented with a drawing pencil, but hopelessly awkward with gentlemen. She was certain to be a dismal failure on the London marriage mart. So Maddie did what generations of shy, awkward young ladies have done: she invented a sweetheart.

A Scottish sweetheart. One who was handsome and honorable and devoted to her, but conveniently never around. Maddie poured her heart into writing the imaginary Captain MacKenzie letter after letter … and by pretending to be devastated when he was (not really) killed in battle, she managed to avoid the pressures of London society entirely.

Until years later, when this kilted Highland lover of her imaginings shows up in the flesh.  The real Captain Logan MacKenzie arrives on her doorstep—handsome as anything, but not entirely honorable. He’s wounded, jaded, in possession of her letters… and ready to make good on every promise Maddie never expected to keep.

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When a Scot Ties the Knot is actually the first book I’ve read by Tessa Dare, but now that I’ve experienced the awesomeness that is this book, it certainly won’t be my last! I adored When a Scot Ties the Knot – I had no idea I’d be in for such a treat with the fantastic writing, the humor, and the wonderful characters. I’m definitely looking forward to reading Tessa Dare’s other books now!

I’m not new to historical romances, but it’s not a genre that I often read. But every once in a while, I get a sudden craving for it, and this latest book by Tessa Dare wholly satisfied that craving. This book was just so… GOOD. It had a sweet, heartfelt romance I was completely invested in, a strong storyline, some fantastic writing… and did I mention the humor? Oh my god, I honestly couldn’t stop giggling when I read this book. I actually can’t believe I haven’t read Tessa Dare’s books sooner, because I loooove funny books, and Maddie and Logan and the Scottish soldiers had me in fits.

“Remember that time I kissed you so hard, you felt it in your toes?”
“No,” she replied defensively. “I only felt it so far as my ankles.”

So about the story: Maddie Gracechurch is a nerdy introvert who makes up a fiancé to avoid getting married off. She’s painfully shy so she wants to avoid going out as much as possible, and she can’t do that if she’s to participate in her first Season. So Maddie invents one Captain Logan MacKenzie, who she pens letters to, pouring her heart and life into them, and then kills him off… even though he’s not real. Except… he is? When the real Captain Logan MacKenzie arrives at her doorstep, Maddie is appalled. Not only because he’s incredibly attractive with a gorgeous Scottish accent, but also because she never thought her letters would be read by anyone. But now Logan is at her home with her letters, telling her he’s read every one of them and is there to claim what he was promised in those letters: land, a castle, and a fiancée.

I loved Maddie – I always find myself loving heroines who are more on the awkward and shy side. Maddie is a sweetheart of a character and I loved her nerdiness. She’s an artist that illustrates species of animals, and she’s been assigned to draw the mating cycle of two lobsters, Fluffy and Rex. This was just… too adorable. Maddie was a highly entertaining heroine.

As for Logan, I’ll admit, I thought he was a jerk in the beginning, but I quickly warmed up to him. He’s determined to marry Maddie so that he’ll gain ownership of her land and castle so that his soldiers have a place to live. Even though he practically forces Maddie to marry him, he does it for honorable reasons. Although it doesn’t hurt that he’s incredibly attracted to Maddie, too. Logan doesn’t believe love is for him, but he definitely wants Maddie.

Logan believed what he’d told her, with everything he had in that place where a heart ought to be. Love was nothing but a lie people told themselves.
But lust?
Lust was real, and he was feeling it. Feeling it to his core. As he held her to him, his blood pounded with the fiercest, most primal kind of need. One that spoke of possession and claiming and mine.
She made him wild.

Tessa Dare writes some hot chemistry that I highly enjoyed. This book is more of a slow burn romance, with lots of yummy tension building and hilarious banter that only serves to amp up the chemistry. I just really enjoyed the way the romance played out – it was the perfect pace for Logan and Maddie. The way they opened their hearts to one another and fell in love was believable and so wonderful to experience.

“Logan, you are my dream. You always were. You have to know that. The deepest desire of my heart. And as wild a fantasy as I spun . . .” She laced her arms about his neck. “. . . the reality of us is so much better.”

When a Scot Ties the Knot was such a satisfying read, so sweet, funny, and charming, that it had me eagerly looking forward to the author’s other works. I honestly can’t believe I haven’t read Tessa Dare sooner! Now that I know how great her writing is, I can’t wait to read more.

4 hearts
lacey

Quotes are taken from the arc and are subject to change in the final version.

Now here’s an excerpt from When a Scot Ties the Knot! ❤

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Prologue

September 21, 1808

Dear Captain Logan MacKenzie,

There is but one consolation in writing this absurd letter. And that is that you, my dear delusion, do not exist to read it.

But I run ahead of myself. Introductions first.

I am Madeline Eloise Gracechurch. The greatest ninny to ever draw breath in England. This will come as a shock, I fear, but you fell deeply in love with me when we did not cross paths in Brighton. And now we are engaged.

Maddie could not remember the first time she’d held a drawing pencil. She only knew she could not recall a time she’d been without one.

In fact, she usually carried two or three. She kept them tucked in her apron pockets and speared in her upswept dark hair, and sometimes—when she needed all her limbs for climbing a tree or vaulting a fence rail—clenched in her teeth.

And she wore them down to nubs. She sketched songbirds when she was supposed to be minding her lessons, and she sketched church mice when she was meant to be at prayer. When she had time to ramble out of doors, anything in Nature was fair game—from the shoots of clover between her toes to any cloud that meandered overhead.

She loved to draw anything. Well, almost anything.

She hated drawing attention to herself.

And thus, at sixteen years old, she found herself staring down her first London season with approximately as much joy as one might anticipate a dose of purgative.

After many years as a widower, Papa had taken a new wife. One a mere eight years older than Maddie herself. Anne was cheerful, elegant, lively. Every- thing her new stepdaughter was not.

Oh, to be Cinderella in all her soot-smeared, rag-clad misery. Maddie would have been thrilled to have a wicked stepmother lock her in the tower while everyone else went to the ball. Instead, she was stuck with a very different sort of stepmother— one eager to dress her in silks, send her to dances, and thrust her into the arms of an unsuspecting prince.

Figuratively, of course.

At best, Maddie was expected to fetch a third son with aspirations to the Church, or perhaps an insolvent baronet.

At worst . . .

Maddie didn’t do well in crowds. More to the point, she didn’t do anything in crowds. In any large gathering—be it a market, a theater, a ballroom— she had a tendency to freeze, almost literally. An arctic sense of terror took hold of her, and the crush of bodies rendered her solid and stupid as a block of ice.

The mere thought of a London season made her shudder.

And yet, she had no choice.

While Papa and Anne (she could not bring her- self to address a twenty-four-year-old as Mama) en- joyed their honeymoon, Maddie was sent to a ladies’ rooming house in Brighton. The sea air and society were meant to coax her out of her shell before her season commenced.

It didn’t quite work that way.

Instead, Maddie spent most of those weeks with shells. Collecting them on the beach, sketching them in her notebook, and trying not to think about parties or balls or gentlemen.

On the morning she returned, Anne greeted her with a pointed question. “There now. Are you all ready to meet your special someone?”

That was when Maddie panicked. And lied. On the spur of the moment, she concocted an outrageous falsehood that would, for better and worse, determine the rest of her life.

“I’ve met him already.”

The look of astonishment on her stepmother’s face was immensely satisfying. But within seconds, Maddie realized how stupid she’d been. She ought to have known that her little statement wouldn’t put paid to the matter. Of course it only launched a hundred other questions.

When is he coming here?

Oh, er . . . He can’t. He wanted to, but he had to leave the country at once.

Whatever for?

Because he’s in the army. An officer.

What of his family? We at least should meet them.

But you can’t. He’s from too far away. All the way in Scotland. And also, they’re dead.

At least tell us his name.

MacKenzie. His name is Logan MacKenzie.

Logan MacKenzie. Suddenly her not-real suitor had a name. By the end of the afternoon, he had hair (brown), eyes (blue), a voice (deep, with a Highland burr), a rank (captain), and a personality (firm, but intelligent and kind).

And that evening, at her family’s urging, Maddie sat down to write him a letter.

. . . Right this moment, they think I am writing a letter to my secret kilted betrothed, and I am filling a page with nonsense instead, just praying no one looks over my shoulder. Worst of all, I shall have no choice but to post the thing when I’m done. It will end up in some military dead letter office. I hope. Or it will be read and passed around whole regiments for ridicule, which I would richly deserve.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. Now the clock is ticking, and when it strikes doom I will have to confess. I will firstly be compelled to explain that I lied about attracting a handsome Scottish officer while staying in Brighton. Then, when I do, I shall have no further excuse to avoid the actual rejection of countless English gentlemen come spring.

My dear imaginary Captain MacKenzie, you are not real and never will be. I, however, am a true and eternal fool.

Here, have a drawing of a snail.

October 5, 1808

Dear not-really-a-Captain MacKenzie,

On second thought, perhaps I won’t have to explain it this year. I might be able to stretch this for a whole season. I must admit, it’s rather convenient. And my family looks at me in a whole new light. I am now a woman who inspired at least one headlong tumble into everlasting love, and really—isn’t one enough?

Because, you see, you are mad for me. Utterly consumed with passion after just a few chance meetings and walks along the shore. You made me a great many promises. I was reluctant to accept them, knowing how our nascent love would be tested by distance and war. But you assured me that your heart is true, and I . . .

And I have read too many novels, I think.

November 10, 1808

Dear Captain MacWhimsy,

Is there anything more mortifying than bearing witness to one’s own father’s love affair? Ugh. We all knew he needed to remarry and produce an heir. To take a young, fertile wife made the most sense. I just didn’t expect him to enjoy it so much, or with so few nods to dignity. Curse this endless war and its effect of hampering proper months-long honeymoons. They disappear together every afternoon, and then I and the servants must all pretend to not know what they are doing. I shudder.

I know I should be happy to see them both happy, and I am. Rather. But until this heir-making project takes root, I think I shall be writing you fewer letters and taking a great many walks.

December 18, 1808

Dear Captain MacFantasy,

I have a new accomplice. My aunt Thea has come to stay. In her youth she was a scandalous demimondaine, ruined at court in France by a wicked comte, but she’s frail and harmless now.

Aunt Thea adores the idea that I’m suffering with love and anxiety for my endangered Scottish officer. I scarcely have to lie at all. “Of course Madeline doesn’t wish to attend parties and balls in London! Can’t you see, the poor dear is eaten with worry for her Captain MacKenzie.”

Truly, it’s a bit frightening how much she cherishes my misery. She has even convinced my father that I should be served breakfasts in my room now, like a married lady or an invalid. I am excused from anything resembling public merriment, I am per- mitted to spend as much time as I please sketching in peace. Chocolate and toast are delivered to my bedside every morning, and I read the newspaper even before Papa has his turn.

I am starting to believe you were a stroke of brilliance.

June 26, 1809

Dear Captain Imaginary MacFigment,

O happy day! Ring the bells, sound the trumpets. Swab the floors with lemon oil. My father’s bride is vomiting profusely every morning, and most every afternoon, as well. The signs are plain. A noisy, smelly, writhing thing will push its way into the world in some six or seven months’ time. Their joy is complete, and I am pushed further and further to the margins of it.

No matter. We have the rest of the world, you and I. Aunt Thea helps me chart the routes of your campaign. She tells me stories about the French countryside so that I might imagine the sights that will greet you as you drive Napoleon to the other side of the Pyrenees. When you smell lavender, she says, victory is near.

I must remind myself to appear sad from time to time, as though I’m worried for you. Sometimes, oddly enough, it’s quite an easy thing to pretend.

Stay well and whole, my captain.

December 9, 1809

Oh, my dear captain,

You will be put out with me. I know I swore my heart to be true, but I must confess. I have fallen in love. Lost my heart to another, irrevocably. His name is Henry Edward Gracechurch. He weighs just a half stone, he’s pink and wrinkled all over . . . and he is perfect. I don’t know how I ever called him a thing. A more beautiful, charming angel never existed.

Now that Papa has an heir, our estate shall never pass to The Dreaded American, and I will never be thrown into genteel poverty. This means I do not have to marry, and I no longer need a fictional Scottish suitor to explain it.

I could claim that we’ve grown apart, put an end to all these silly letters and lies. But Aunt Thea is ever so fond of you by now, and I am ever so fond of her. Besides, I would miss writing.

It’s the oddest thing. I do not understand myself. But sometimes I fancy that you do.

November 9, 1810

Dear Logan,

(Surely we can claim a Christian-name familiarity by now.)

What follows is an exercise in pure mortification. I can’t even believe I’m going to write it down, but perhaps putting it on paper and sending it away will help rid me of the stupid habit. You see, I have a pillow. It’s a fine pillow, all stuffed with goose down. Quite firm and big. Almost a bolster, really. At night I put it on one side of the bed and place a hot brick beneath it to warm it all up. Then I nestle up alongside it, and if I close my eyes and fall into that half-sleep place . . . I can almost believe it’s you. Beside me. Keeping me warm and safe. But it’s not you, because it is a pillow and you are not even a real person. And I am a bug. But now I’ve grown so accustomed to the thing, I can’t sleep without it. The nights simply stretch too long and lonely.

Wherever you are, I hope you are sleeping well. Sweet dreams, Captain MacPillow.

July 17, 1811

My dear Highland laird and captain,

You have pulled off quite a trick for a man who is no more than a pillow stuffed with lies and embroidered with a hint of personality. You are going to be a land- owner. Aunt Thea has convinced my godfather, the Earl of Lynforth, to leave me a little something in his will. That “little something” being a castle in the Scottish Highlands. Lannair Castle, it’s called. It is meant to be our home when you return from war. That is the perfect ending to this masterpiece of absurdity, isn’t it?

Dear Lord. A castle.

March 16, 1813

Dear captain of my heart’s true folly,

Little Master Henry and Miss Emma are growing like reeds. I’ve enclosed a sketch. Thanks to their doting mama, they have learnt to say their nightly prayers. And every night—my heart twists to write it—they pray for you. “God bless and keep our brave Captain MacKenzie.” Well, the way Emma says it, it sounds more like “Cap’n Macaroni.” And each time they pray for you, I feel my own soul sliding ever closer to brimstone. This has all gone too far, and yet—if I were to reveal my lie, they would despise me. And mourn you. After all, it’s been almost five years since we did not meet in Brighton.

You are part of our family now.

June 20, 1813

My dear, silent friend,

It breaks my heart, but I have to do it. I must. I can’t bear the guilt any longer. There’s only one way to end this now.

You have to die.

I’m so sorry. You can’t know how sorry. I prom- ise, I’ll make it a valiant death. You’ll save four—no, six—other men in a feat of courage and noble sac- rifice. As for me, I’m devastated. These are genuine tears dotting this parchment. The mourning I shall wear for you will be real, as well. It’s as though I’m killing off part of myself—the part that had all those romantic, if foolish, hopes. I will settle into life as a spinster now, just as I always knew I would. I will never be married. Or held, or loved. Maybe if I write those things out, I’ll get used to the truth of them. It’s time to stop lying and put aside dreaming.

My darling, departed Captain MacKenzie . . . Adieu.

Reading Order: Castles Ever After series

Romancing the Duke by Tessa Dare Say Yes to the Marquess by Tessa Dare When a Scot Ties the Knot by Tessa Dare

#1 ~ Romancing the Duke: EbookPaperback • AudibleGoodreads
#2 ~ Say Yes to the Marquess: EbookPaperback • AudibleGoodreads
#3 ~ When a Scot Ties the Knot: EbookPaperback • Audible • Goodreads

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Tessa DareTessa Dare is the New York Times bestselling, award-winning author of more than a dozen historical romances. A librarian by training and a book-lover at heart, Tessa lives in Southern California with her husband, their two children, and a big brown dog.

Website • Twitter • Facebook • Goodreads

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